March 2020 Recap

• Best song I heard for the first time

This is actually not the first time I heard this, but it's amazing.  They can improvise as a duet (no bass or drums) and create a complete sound.  You can listen to this as you read the blog, if you wish!

• Best picture

I like this one of my daughters posing on a wall

• Best thing that kids did

I happened to sleep in, so my oldest child made a breakfast for herself and her sister.  She heated up water to make oatmeal, and microwaved sausages, and put fruit on each plate. This was the first time she made a whole breakfast like that.  I was really proud!

They are really creative and made lego creations, played outside, made up stories, made forts.  They also have a lot of screen time lately.

• Biggest challenge

I have issues with spending money on the house.  We got kind of a fixer-upper, and sometimes I wish we had taken on more debt, in order to have more of a finished house.  Either that, or select a more modest home that was more finished.  With young children, we don't have time and energy to renovate, so we've lived in a house for years now that's been in need of paint job and renovations.  We have gotten some projects done, but there's a long way to go.  

Anyway, we have to replace the siding on one side of our house, due to wood rot on the chimney, and a window leak.   We already paid thousands of dollars for wood rot on the chimney six years ago, and it showed up again.    So this time we are getting Hardie board, which is a concrete material, and will last for 20 years.   That being said, it's so expensive that we will put off vacations and any major purchases, and we are scrutinizing spending in general.  I was hoping to spend on a new family van, but it will have to survive another year.  The ironic development of this, is that travel is shut down anyway due to the coronavirus, so this is a good year to not have money to spend on travel. Even spending in stores in general is shut down due to shelter in place.

The biggest challenge is keeping my spirit encouraged about spending a lot on home repairs.  I have found out it is actually a very common problem, and many homeowners feel the pain of these types of projects. That makes me feel that our situation is normal.  And I do need to be thankful that we can afford a house with plenty of space in a good neighborhood.

I also deal with the fear, of what if they don't do a good job, and the window still leaks when they are done. What if nail pops show up all over the interior wall, which we just repaired last summer.    Or what if I should have paid someone a lot less to do less.  The majority of the siding is actually good.   The problem is we actually did engage with a company to replace parts of the siding, but they began and stopped, saying that the chimney framing was all rotted, and insisted on only repairing the entire wall.  They were kind enough to put a tarp up, which lasted all winter and then some.

I tend to imagine all possible worst (and unlikely) situations, that is just something that can come in handy for my database work, and sometimes for life, but can sometimes is not a helpful trait.   The only thing I can do is to stay positive, and be grateful for what I have, and to trust that I've made the right decision after analyzing it. 

• What I learned in jazz piano

I started transcribing the saxophone part of "Faith" by Joshua Redman.  This is a song I've listened to for a long time.  I've been using an app called AnyTune to slow down the music to hear the parts.  I was initially interested in the saxophone part, but have also been amazed by bass playing, and figuring out the chord progression..  I have wanted to do this type of thing for a decade, and didn't really have the money to get into it, but now the used 5-year-old MacBooks are more affordable.

Toward the end of the month, I have been figuring out the chord progression for "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road" by Elton John.

• Best & worst book I read

I'm almost done with "How the Bible Actually Works", by Peter Enns.  I really devour this type of material, since it's so refreshing to read about the Bible in an objective way.  There is a ton of interesting information about the Bible in here that they don't teach you in church.   It really helps me to appreciate and understand the Bible more, because there are actually a lot of inconsistencies in the Bible, and when they are swept under the rug, that is counterproductive for me.

I read the first half of The Success Principles again.  I rarely re-read books, but this one has made a really positive impact on me. I just made it through half of it this time, since it's such a large book.

I finished reading SQL Server 2019 Revealed, by Bob Ward, which I received for free at PASS Summit 2019.  It is a well-written book.  I am trying to understand containers, and having a bit of trouble understanding everything. I'm most excited about the intelligent query processing in SQL Server 2019.

I am also listening to the audiobook, Harry Potter, and the Prisoner of Azkaban.  I listened this during my work commute, so my progress has come to a halt, but I have listened to 50% of it.  The plot is off to a slow start. 

• Best & worst movie I saw for the first time

The best was Despicable Me 2.  It was very funny - I laughed out loud more than I had in a long time.  10 stars of 10

An American Tail, was more of a bad movie.  Not just due to the old animation.  Almost all the characters are stereotypes of something. and don't seem to be characters in their own right.  The exception would be Warren T. Rat, who quotes Shakespeare, and his sidekick, Digit.   4 stars out of 10.

Where'd You Go Bernadette was more of a bad movie as well.   This was one of the best fiction books I've read in the past few years.  The movie did shake up the plot in some major ways, especially with that having to do with the title.  The movie tells you at the very beginning where Bernadette is, and leaves no mystery to it.  So the title is ridiculous about asking where she went. The book is definitely better for this one.  Cate Blanchett did a great acting job, but she was the total focus of the movie, and it got old watching her react to events.  In the book, the daughter, Bee, is a more central character, in the movie Bee is more of a side character.   4 stars out of 10.

• Best inspirational thought

Act now.  

Acting upon something is sometimes the best way to find out what you need to actually do, rather than analyzing it.

• Best & worst moment with children

Best moments:
I went out exploring with my older daughter two times.  We followed a creek the first time, and then the second time, we followed some trails in the woods, and worked on a fort made of branches.

I played with my younger daughter every day. Lately, she likes to grab onto my leg, and I have to get it free.   When the older daughter joins in, it's actually really tough to break free.  The game she likes the most is when I take her stuffed animals, and she tackles me to get them back.   I am proud to create happy playing moments with them, some of which they will remember for a life time.

Worst moments: Our daughters act too entitled.  For example, if they weren't the individuals who used a box of cereal, then they feel it's an injustice to be the one to put it away.  When really it just takes about 10 seconds to put the box of cereal away.  And the parents do these types of selfless actions all day long, and have for years.  Anyway, something like this happened, which ended up with threats being handed out if the box of cereal were not put away soon without additional complaining.  Then it escalated into everyone being upset.  We are working on teaching proper attitudes though.  

• Best & worst marriage moment

Best moment:
We were on a family walk, and we left the trail and went onto a creek bed, and skipped stones.  My wife and I kissed and hugged by the creek, and the kids joined in on the hug.

Worst moment
My wife and I have differing views on medical care.  I tend to see doctors as overreacting, and since the lawsuits are so prevalent now, doctors will ask for follow up tests that are not actually necessary.   My wife will take advice of doctors, and health officials very seriously.   Anyway, this coronavirus has brought this difference out in the culture in general, and on a smaller case between my wife and me.  I was totally willing to attend church, then it ended up being cancelled.   I see the wisdom in it now.  But at the beginning, it was hard for me to see why it was important to avoid crowds, since we only knew of 4 cases of positive tests in our county.   I guess the caution is all for the best, but it seems like too much panic as well.  Anyway, as it pertains to marriage, there were sometimes some tense disagreements about the seriousness of coronavirus.    

On the weekend of the 16th, we went shopping at several major stores, and had small group on Sunday.  Then on Monday, suddenly my wife's new rule was that we weren't supposed to leave the house at all.  It seemed like a sudden change in expectations that was not communicated.  Needless to say, I was eager to get out of the house with the kids for Spring Break, and this caused a major disagreement.  It turned out the same weekend, we found out school is postponed until April 3, and my work decided to have everyone work from home.

• Best & worst work moment

I had a good work moment when some people had a problem with a coworker, I went and talked to him about it, rather than just talking to others about him.  I learned this philosophy from one of my favorite books, The Success Principles, by Jack Canfield.  Here is an excerpt from page 14.

Have you ever noticed that people almost always complain to the wrong person - to someone who can't do anything about their complaint?  They go to work and complain about their spouse;  then they come home and complain to their spouse about the people at work.  Why?  Because it's easier;  it's less risky...Learn to replace complaining with making requests and taking action that will achieve your desired outcomes.

The worst work moment was perhaps when people started arguing about the seriousness of coronavirus, before we were all made to work from home.  It was a similar situation as worst marriage moment above!  Overall though, I grew weary of coronavirus talk at work.  This is a really big deal though, like nothing we've seen before.  Working from home will actually be good for productivity in some ways.

More Coronavirus thoughts
There were some people devastated by the COVID-19 virus in their jobs, and unemployment claims were 1000% more than previous weeks.  Schools were cancelled for the rest of the school year.  Some people were graduating high school, and they missed some anticipated events and accomplishments.     I'm thankful that our household is not affected much financially yet. A bad economy affects everyone, and the government giving out 2 trillion dollars when it's already trillions of dollars in debt, will eventually be very bad for every citizen.    We of course had some disappointments due to school being cancelled, and I will list them here.

1st grader

1. 1st grade musical, "Go Fish", where she was going to have some lines as the Octopus
2. Her best friend in her class is moving away in the summer, and she doesn't know how to contact her, and didn't have a chance to say goodbye
3. She has been going to 2nd grade math each day, and who knows what level of math she will be in when they get back.
4. Dance recital in May is up in the air.
5. Really wanted to go to Take Your Child to Work Day, the first year that she was old enough to go, but that will probably not happen this year

4th grader

1. Said she will miss having lunch with her friends (they have assigned seats)
2. Will miss field trip to the State Capital in Topeka
3. Was participating in Girls on the Run, which ends in a 5K.  It has now been cancelled.

Wife

1. Was enjoying independence, and now summer starts 2 months early.  The independence ended suddenly, now she's trying to homeschool.
2. Her part-time job is affected, because she works for a charity, and charities are hard hit in times like these.  

Myself

I'm actually enjoying the change of scenery and pace, working from home.  I was already fairly socially distanced compared to the general populace.  Our family does not tend to go at a hectic pace, and I don't commit to too many activities.  I'm thankful to not be affected in super negative ways.  

The most annoying thing is living with the fear that I will unintentionally infect others, or pick up the virus in a store.  I don't care if I get it necessarily, I just don't want to pass it along to others who may become more ill from it.  Also, my wife and I have been sick with a non-coronavirus virus, and being sick is not fun.  If we wanted to make sure we don't have coronavirus, we wouldn't be able to get tested, since there are limited test kits, and we don't show the symptoms required to be tested.